If I rewind all the way back to my return home after my first trip you'll probably get a better idea of how this new adventure came about (more on what this new adventure is later as well). Coming home at the end of 2015 was awesome, I had spent the last 14 months trotting around the globe by myself and sometimes with friends. I learned to speak another language, and to understand the basics of two others. I made new friendships, some of which were fleeting, only meant to last as long as my stop in that new place, others for life. I pushed my anxious, self critical and shy self to do things that would have me breaking out in a sweat before (to clarify, I am still an anxious sweaty mess when having to do new things, I am just getting a lot better at talking myself into things). But at the end of the day New Zealand is still my home, it is where (the majority) of my friends and family call home. So yes, coming back was awesome, it was also unexpectedly not awesome. |
But like most things, eventually the shine wears off. You have seen everyone and caught up on all the news you have missed, and then you look around and realise that life goes on and everything feels the same, except you are different. The places you have been, the time you have spent alone and with new people has changed you ever so slightly. Its something that maybe everyone doesn't notice, but you do. And the stupid thing is, I had read about this! I thought I was prepared, silly me. I found this quote that probably sums it up more articulately than I ever could.
" You will never be completely at home again, because part of your heart will always be else where. That is the price you pay for the richness of loving and knowing people in more than one place"
- Miriam Adeney
As a plus, I was beyond lucky to be living in an amazing location (living at the beach was on my bucket list, and I think this little water baby will be happy for that particular item to remain there), and made the most of the great outdoors that New Zealand is known for (I still have a lot of hikes on my list though if anyone wants to tag along).
Now I have been here for five days (my host parents are probably regretting telling me I could stay for as long as I wanted), and still have some time up my sleeve before I head out to look for a job and work my butt off for the summer. Hopefully that sums up the story quite nicely for anyone who I didn't get to see before I left (there were a few). Back to planning my next moves.
Conte contat, conte acabat.
Besos xx